What Authenticity Doesn’t Mean
I talk a lot about authenticity... But when leaders misinterpret authenticity, things can go sideways fast.
Leaders who mean well but end up creating confusion, chaos, or even resentment because they misunderstood what it means to be authentic.
So let’s clear a few things up.
Myth #1: Authenticity = Brutal Honesty
“I’m just telling it like it is.”
You’ve probably heard someone say this right before they drop a verbal grenade in a meeting.
But authenticity isn’t about weaponizing honesty.
It’s about speaking truth with empathy.
Yes, be honest.
But if your “truth” leaves a trail of broken trust and hurt feelings, you’ve missed the point.
Myth #2: Authenticity = Comfort
“I’m showing up how I feel today. Sweatpants and all.”
Listen, I love a good sweatpants or sweatshirt day as much as anyone.
But authenticity doesn’t excuse a lack of professionalism or preparation. Know your audience - there is a time and a place.
Authenticity is about showing up as your real self while respecting the context you’re in.
Think of it this way:
There’s a difference between “relaxed and approachable” and “looks like they just rolled out of bed.”
Both send a message.
Myth #3: Authenticity = No Boundaries
“I share everything about my life at work.”
Oversharing is not the same as being authentic.
Vulnerability is powerful when it’s intentional.
If you spill your deepest fears to your entire team with no plan, you’re not building connection, you’re creating discomfort.
So What Is Authenticity?
Here’s my take, shaped by my a framework:
Reflect on Purpose – Know why you’re sharing something before you share it.
Embrace Vulnerability – Open up in ways that foster trust, not chaos.
Align Actions with Values – Walk your talk, every time.
Listen and Learn – Stay open to feedback and growth.
So here it is…
Authenticity isn’t a free pass to say whatever you want or skip the hard parts of leadership.
It’s about showing up as your best, most grounded self.
The version of you that inspires others to do the same.
Because when people see the real you, not the “perfect leader” version, and not the “I don’t care what anyone thinks” version, that’s when real trust is built.